Stop Trying To Make “Fetch” Happen.


Look, I get that other coffee places have their own clever names for drinks. The smaller Mom-N-Pop drive-throughs and locally owned independent coffee shops do this to set themselves apart from, well, us. It’s good. It’s called competition. And that’s good for everyone.

Someone used to ordering one of these drinks at another store can usually just order how they normally do and we can figure it out. If not, well, we ask for a little clarification. Pretty simple, right? Maybe.

You: “I’ll have large iced revolver mocha.”

Me (not just a little confused by the terminology): “Uhh… revolver mocha? I’m sorry, I don’t know what you mean.”

You (looking at me as if a bouquet of roses has just sprouted out of my head): “Six. Shots. Hence the name.”

Me (smiling as if I think you’re oh so clever): “Ah, yes. That kind of makes sense now. Never heard that before.”

You shake your head and sigh as if you’re dealing with a complete dipshit.

Dude, I know how you feel.

I did a little research (a very little) and discovered at least one place that has a 6 shot espresso drink called a Revolver.

My coworkers never heard of it before, either. We all agreed that it made sense and was kind of cool. And that your attitude ruined the joy of discovering a new term.

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4 Comments

Filed under *The Coffee Shop Days*, Oh The Humanity!, Retail Rant

4 responses to “Stop Trying To Make “Fetch” Happen.

  1. That is one of my all time favorite moments in that movie. I always think it’s sad when someone has to prove how cool they are because they know a new term or phrase for something and you don’t know it. It’s exhausting and pointless.

  2. Exactly. Like in this case, the guy could simply have said “I’ll have a six shot mocha, some places call it a ‘revolver’.” and I would have said “Hey, that’s a pretty cool term for it…” instead of thinking the guy was just an ass.

  3. A revolver? Give me a break. He was just pleased with himself that he was actually able to use the term in that context. He’d heard some hipster say it and has been busting at the seams to use it himself. What a jerk-off. I’m sure he’s heard that term before.

    • Pretty sure he’s heard that term at least a few times, DMTF… and you’re right. I’m certain he gets a kick out of getting exactly the reaction I gave him, like he’s playing a game of Stump The Barista.
      I gotcher revolver right here, pal…

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